♥
Monday, November 26, 2007
I felt it once before.at least once which left a scar in my heart...
No way i can tell you how to deal with it and how you could feel better. Cos you did the same thing to me and the hurt you are experiencing now was how i felt last time.
don't you remember the time when i called you up and i was all excited and happy til you disappoint me by saying 'ga enak aja' when i asked you why you weren't talking?and then i said ok,i shall not disturb you anymore and you hung up on me.
Yeah..history does repeat.
♥
omg I think you're somehow like a drug. I hate it that it makes me so heavily addicted...i just can't control it. Is it that hard not to have you in my mind for at least an hour???
It seems THAT hard right now.
My dad just talked to me about goin to Oz to study again. and I realised he never fails to talk about it-when i am not feeling well. He'll start saying 'how are you going to study there like this?? you have toothache, u call mama, ur body itch, u look for her...' =.=
that's not true..........................................!
anyway, i think i can forget about eating ayam penyet again. It makes my stomach so upset...that yes,im back to eating porridge.
I have decided that it would be better that i make this blog a private one after today.
OHya...i somehow started to open up the box and look at our neoprints. I realised it's freaking one year ago that we took those pics!!!why is it that i still feel your closeness at times?
you are so far yet so near..i really crave..crave to meet you and just feel you.
♥
We chat for the second time since i unblocked him. It was sweet....
in the first place, I had to block him in order to move on...it's unfair to me if i dont give myself chances and solution and ways to move on.so well, half way chatting i accidentally close the window of our conversation. DARN. its the com's fault actually....huh,i wanted to save it and re read it perhaps next time. Anyway.....we talk about quite serious stuff. I dont know if he really meant it, i feel that he did...but,part of me just can't trust him fully anymore.
How can it be that he wants to be with me ..as in spend his life with me as a soulmate when right now he is dating a girl? Does that mean he loves us both or...??? it's confusing..lots of questions in my mind right now.
I wanted to ask every questions in my head...but too bad you kept going brb.
I wanted badly to make evrything be really clear to the both of us.....but dint have the chance just now.agh.. and i showed him 2 posts from this blog.
i dont know when i'll be ever ready to let him know everything here...
to be honest,i wanted to keep chatting with him and not sleep......but we couldnt of course.
and before we ended it off....he said those words to me.
but what exactly does that mean? and where are we heading to?.................
i'm scared im taking the wrong steps again.
♥
Monday, November 26, 2007
I felt it once before.at least once which left a scar in my heart...
No way i can tell you how to deal with it and how you could feel better. Cos you did the same thing to me and the hurt you are experiencing now was how i felt last time.
don't you remember the time when i called you up and i was all excited and happy til you disappoint me by saying 'ga enak aja' when i asked you why you weren't talking?and then i said ok,i shall not disturb you anymore and you hung up on me.
Yeah..history does repeat.
♥
omg I think you're somehow like a drug. I hate it that it makes me so heavily addicted...i just can't control it. Is it that hard not to have you in my mind for at least an hour???
It seems THAT hard right now.
My dad just talked to me about goin to Oz to study again. and I realised he never fails to talk about it-when i am not feeling well. He'll start saying 'how are you going to study there like this?? you have toothache, u call mama, ur body itch, u look for her...' =.=
that's not true..........................................!
anyway, i think i can forget about eating ayam penyet again. It makes my stomach so upset...that yes,im back to eating porridge.
I have decided that it would be better that i make this blog a private one after today.
OHya...i somehow started to open up the box and look at our neoprints. I realised it's freaking one year ago that we took those pics!!!why is it that i still feel your closeness at times?
you are so far yet so near..i really crave..crave to meet you and just feel you.
♥
We chat for the second time since i unblocked him. It was sweet....
in the first place, I had to block him in order to move on...it's unfair to me if i dont give myself chances and solution and ways to move on.so well, half way chatting i accidentally close the window of our conversation. DARN. its the com's fault actually....huh,i wanted to save it and re read it perhaps next time. Anyway.....we talk about quite serious stuff. I dont know if he really meant it, i feel that he did...but,part of me just can't trust him fully anymore.
How can it be that he wants to be with me ..as in spend his life with me as a soulmate when right now he is dating a girl? Does that mean he loves us both or...??? it's confusing..lots of questions in my mind right now.
I wanted to ask every questions in my head...but too bad you kept going brb.
I wanted badly to make evrything be really clear to the both of us.....but dint have the chance just now.agh.. and i showed him 2 posts from this blog.
i dont know when i'll be ever ready to let him know everything here...
to be honest,i wanted to keep chatting with him and not sleep......but we couldnt of course.
and before we ended it off....he said those words to me.
but what exactly does that mean? and where are we heading to?.................
i'm scared im taking the wrong steps again.
